Welcome to the TOP TEN ANIME
BABES of ALL TIME!
Before we get started with the countdown, let me first 'splain
to you what qualifies as an "Anime Babe" and then we'll
take a look at the runners up.
Anime Babe (ah-knee' may bay'b):
[noun] A female from the
anime universe who possesses great beauty, a marvelous attitude,
and the ability to act upon her desires to acquire that which
she wants most (whatever that may be).
The Rules for Picking the Top Ten
Anime Babes of All Time:
Rule Number One:
She must be made out of pencil and paint. No flesh and
blood girls here.
Rule Number Two:
She must be attractive and not merely "cute"
(meaning the judges decide what is "hot beauty" and
what is simply "kawaii") (so according to the judges
all "Noriko Takayas" are out). While this may be open
to interpretation by you, the viewers, the judges' decisions
Rule Number Three: The
contestants' taste in men has no relevance on them being considered
an "Anime Babe". Since all anime girls are doomed
to love total geeks or other social outcasts, the subject of
boyfriends has no bearing on the judges' final decisions (especially
because most of the judges are social misfits too).
Rule Number Four:
There must be more to an "Anime Babe" than just
looks. She must have "attitude" and the "ability
to achieve and maintain" all that her attitude alludes to
(don't ask). Not one or the other (so no Rei Ayanami's).
The roles of the Judges
There were over 100 judges who voted for the Top
Ten Anime Babes of All Time. Each of them got only five votes.
They each had to choose a first, second, third, fourth, and fifth
place "Babe" out of the infinite number of Anime Babes
in the known universe. The first pick received five points, second
got four, third got three points, fourth got two, and the fifth
pick of each judge received one point. The judges also had to
give adequate reason why they made the choices that they did.
The votes were then tallied up and a runoff quickie
vote was held because there was a tie for the tenth "Babe"
slot (they received the same number of votes and both their reasons
for being babes were really good). A winner was quickly decided
and the contest was over. A little over two hours of the lives
of the judges were wasted, but like they had anything better
Now, let us meet some of our Celebrity
there were over 100, we'll just give the names of the most popular
judges in our panel.
First, the Anti-Babe
Julie Checks, Edward Asner, Werner Klemperer,
Mark Hamill, John Bobbitt, the Rossman, Deborah Harry, Ted Danson,
Larry Storch, Alan Hale and David Drummer.
The decisions of this fine panel are final (for now) and the
winners will forever be known as the Top
Ten Anime Babes of All Time....... atleast until someone
better comes along.
In response to our esteemed judges' request to
clear up any misconceptions and build up some more anticipation
and tension we shall offer an example of what they decided was
the epitome of the "Anti-Babe". The absolute polar
opposite of what the Number One Anime Babe of All Time should
That's right, Belldandy
is the Anti-Babe! First of all, she's way too cute, and not "hot"
in the least. She's a naive crybaby who sits at home and resigns
herself to accept her problems instead of acting on them and
finding a solution to them. She didn't even put up a fight when
she was being forced to leave everything that she loved to go
back to her job that she obviously hated (even when her two sisters
did everything in their powers for her sake to keep her from
going!). We hate to say this (considering he is one of the worst
losers in the Anime Universe), but Keiichi was too good for her!
Did we mention that she cries a lot?
you have it. The antipodal thing to which all other prospective
"Babes" were judged by to see just how much babe material
they had in them.
And now it's time to introduce the runners up (in
no particular order). These babes came very close to making the
top ten, but for one reason or another they fell just shy of
placing in this very tough competion. Without further ado.....
A Soviet mecha pilot in a future where the USSR is
no more, Jung shows that she really doesn't give a rat's ass
about little things like 'history' and 'democracy'. She's a positive
thinker who makes her own rules in life.
Jung is a fiery red head (get used to hearing that)
who 'aims for the top', only to fall a little bit short. That
would be okay in and of itself (nobody's perfect), but the fact
that she failed to show up that crybaby Takaya is what kept her
from the actual Top Ten. Sorry Jung.
It's a little known fact but Jung is actually
alive (somehow) at the end of Gunbuster thousands of years in
the future! Cool, huh?
Point, shoot, flick off. Yup, she's got it down
Who says that an "anime babe" has to be
mortal? Armitage is more human than human anyway. Plus, anything
that looks that good in hotpants deserves points for something.
Her only downside is her tendency to rush into things
headstrong without any thought of the consequences...... and
the fact that she lives on Mars and our male judges thought that
it was just too far away for a real relationship (they tend to
blur 'reality' and 'fantasy' into one giant confusing category).
The Lovely Angels
Kei and Yuri got it goin' on! They have the badge,
the bodies, and the go go boots to kick ass and take no prisoners
(and they rarely ever do).
Not to mention the fact that they're friends with
a Military Utility Genetic Higher
Intelligence (aka Mughi) in the form of a giant
hair ball. These babes can rock the house down past its foundation
(and they often do), and oh yeah, one of them's even a red head^_^
Of course, I bet you can guess what kept them out
of the Top Ten. Sorry girls, but our insurance just wouldn't
cover you. Gomen.
Ah, the Dirty- Lovely Angels! Lovely Angels!
Just kidding there^_^
Rarlgon Empress, redhead, and babe extraordinaire!
This elfish-looking beauty has it all: looks, power
beyond imagination and a warm compassion for even the stupidest
of God's creatures. She would even willingly sacrifice herself
to be with those that she loves (no matter how totally lethargic
and dimwitted they may be).
The only thing that really kept her out of the Top
Ten is that she is the enemy of all mankind. Bummer.
The Entire Female Cast of Bakuretsu
They are all total babes to the ultimate extreme!
Very attractive, great outfits, and the drive to attain the unattainable
(whether it be that sap, Carrot or something else entirely) rank
them high up on the list, but their uninhibited personalities
were simply way too over the top to get them a numbered ranking.
(The judges want to be clear that they really loved their
outfits. They loved them!)
I never thought I'd say this, but sometimes they
need to put some clothes on.
Well, I guess ya gotta be careful when you call
her or you might end up mentally scarring this beauty :(
@_@!! Holy $#*%! All we can think of doing is pointing
out her outfit! Oooooh, Toilet Hanako-san *_*...... Please appear!
Hanako is a ghost. She makes her home in boys restrooms.
She appears when you call her name.... Holy f***in' crap, what
a g**damn concept @_@!!!! She's gorgeous, flirty, pretty smart
(she seems to hide her brains behind her "love bags"
for some reason) and her voice is just sooooooooo 0_o!! Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!
Oh man, when a bunch of the judges and I were watching Haunted
Junction we would all just totally melt whenever this hot
thang would start talking. Her voice is just so damn sexy!!
The only problem with her is that she lives in the
friggin' bathroom! That's just nasty! Sure it's good when you
need some more toilet paper or something ("Hanako-san, could
you spare a square?"), but if you try and visit her after
some fat schlong went #2 you'd pass out after a few seconds despite
her best sweet efforts.
This elf has it going on. She's attractive, leggy,
she's got some cool spells and she's one with nature.
The problem? Too "goody-goody". She's always
nice and does the "right thing" which makes her a little
boring. Our judges needed a bit more "tramp". Sadly,
Deedlit didn't cut it.
She just needs to get "nasty" every
once in a while.
Not a "hugger".
Cool outfit, nice guns, and a freaky but rugged anime
hair cut. She knows what she wants (Zeiram's head on a stick)
and she does her best to acquire it. It's not her fault that
she never really succeeds, it's just that the producers like
Her biggest problem, however, is totally her
fault. Iria simply refuses to loosen up. She needs to let what's
left of her hair down and relax a lil' bit. I bet if you stuck
a lump of coal-
Whahomina-whooo ah! Urd is "sexy" incarnate!
She's hot, and attractive, and hot, and beautiful, and very hot!
Just one itsy bitsy teeny weeny hornets' nest messes
up this almost perfect dish.... She's home, but the attic light
ain't on. She's a few cards short of a deck. The elevator doesn't
go all the way up to the top. She's a few bricks short of a load.
She's a few fries short of a
Happy Meal (tm)
Unquestionably the best "Cat-Girl"
in anime today, she knows how to flaunt the goods. She's an Amazon
who knows how to cook, and she wears pajamas almost all the time.
The only problem that kept coming up in the voting
was her total uninhibition. While in her quest for a husband
(good thing) she would not suppress anything as she oft went
*ahem* all out (bad thing).
Dear Lord above! Thank you for making this purple-headed
hottie! Faye is a cool bounty hunter livin' out of time in the
future, onboard the Bebop with the universes' coolest canine
Ein. She knows how to gamble James Bond Style, how to fly cool
spaceships and how to outshoot most losers and rivals she comes
across. And she's in one of the jazziest shows of all
The one really bad mark against her is that she has
the opportunity to be such a classy "Fujiko-esque"
leading lady, but she usually goes for the more trampy look and
attitude (not that there's anything wrong with that). She could
be muuuuuch more deadly if she went "stylin'" more
often (and even though she still looks great in those little
yellow hotpants, she's just unstoppable in a vampy evening gown!).
Faye and a play in the hay, but not molded in
clay, would make my day.
And there it is. Now you know how we judge which girls are
Holy Smokin' Babes, and which are only burnt ashes, or something.
Now it's time to feast your eyes on the winners of the Ultimate
Tribute to Anime - Babedom. The
Top Ten Anime Babes of All Time!!!!!
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2
Or check out
the Top Ten Anime Skanks